As I mentioned in my last post I was doing some wedding photography to
help Andy out Saturday.
Friday we went to the rehearsal so that we could check out the location.
I noticed a guy with two cameras around his neck and joked to Andy
"he's going to be a problem tomorrow." I figured he was somebody's
uncle. I'm slow, it's chemo fog. I will use that excuse as long as I
Saturday came and I went to the bridal suite to capture the "getting
ready" stage. I was a wreck because the light was horrible. I had
visions of the camera battery dying before the ceremony.
While I was taking a few shots of the bride's dress hanging and the
bouquets and so on, I noticed there was no Bridezilla, but the Mother
of the Bride was IN CHARGE.
Now, we were hired by THE GROOM. So MOTB was terrorizing the
bridesmaids (things like "you realize you're the only one wearing a
necklace, right?" and gnashing her teeth that one flowergirl's mother
had used tiny silk flowers instead of The Headband We Made.)
I was standing next to the bridesmaid who was carefully clenching the
ringbearer pillow because she was TOLD to hang on to it. Then
Mommyzilla took her opening shot at me.
MOTB looke at me and said "at two o'clock 'Frank' will be here. I
hired him to take a portrait of me with my daughters."
I immediately realized that Frank was Uncle Camera Buff and he was a
Pro. Shooting THIS wedding. Ooooops!
More importantly, Mommyzilla wanted to fight. But I put on my best
southern charm face and said, "oh, that's so NICE!"
It was meant as a sweetly phrased eff you that would leave her no next
move since I wasn't arguing with her. It seemed like it worked -
I have to say, I learned a few things from Frank about how to stage
some of the group shots, and he was very cool about letting me use his
shots. He even came looking for me when they were about to cut the
cake. It was nice of him not to throw me any elbows at all! :)
I could have done without the guy at my table for dinner who noticed
me wilting a little bit (no lunch, bad Carly) and DRUMMED ON THE TABLE
to get my attention when I was resting my temples on my fingers for a
minute. "You look like you're about to fall asleep!" he scolded me.
And then stared at me off and on all through dinner. Eff YOU darlin,
I didn't eat lunch and I have itchy hands and feet from the chemo I
just finished last week and I haven't slept through the night in I
don't know when...
I should have fed him to Momzilla.