Wednesday, April 07, 2010

The easy way out

I keep thinking that if I am "good" I can somehow dodge the side
effects of chemo. If I eat right and only eat certain foods my
stomach will be swell and .... Yeah, it's not working. I am not in
control, it's not that easy.

Today was not a great day; I ate a couple of things that may or may
not have contributed to my downfall; who's to know? When I saw the
writing on the wall I drove home mid-day (crying in frustration). I
felt pretty lousy. UNDERSTATEMENT!!

I took some medicines, retired to my dear pillow, waited to feel
better, and had plenty of time to mull over something that crops up
now and then: "I'd chop them off".

Some women, when the topic comes up, loudly declare "if I ever get
breast cancer I'll just cut them off..."

It's not that simple.

Everyone seems to think that you just snip them off, lie around on the
couch for the weekend, and you're done. Well, let me tell you. Major
surgery and you come home with implanted surgical tubing that drains
into containers (which you have to carry around more or less, and
empty...)

People seem to think it's a Get Out of Cancer Free card, and you just
won't have to worry about that pesky c-word. Not so. There is
approximately a 5% recurrence rate, if I remember what my surgeon said.

Depending on what type of cancer and how far along it is, you could
also end up still needing chemo anyway like my friend Ethel. And
that's after reconstructive procedures. Plural. The empty implants get
put in place, then gradually filled.

In the meantime? The scars? You don't even want to google the pictures
if it's your own face you're mentally adding in.

Ethel even got a bonus round - she was in the early cycles of her
chemo treatment and her implants got infected. They had to be removed.
She's going to have to start over if she wants ta-ta's. Did I mention
nips? Those can be tatooed on later. Yes, really.

So, some would say that it was ME who took the easy way out. Four
incisions, one opening, repairing that and redoing margins.. Piece of
cake.

Now if only I could have a damn piece of cake.

2 comments:

Mitowa said...

Seems like it takes forever, but, really, it'll go by faster than you think. There will still be residual effects that linger for a while, but you'll keep feeling better and better. Just hang in there! I took the nausea pills on a regular basis, and only had the first bout, before I started them. Got really sick of taking pills, though!

Sgt said...

Easy way or otherwise, you're way stronger than I am!

I complained when the nurse ripped my skin drawing blood.

Cake is overrated anyway!