Thursday, May 28, 2009

So! Yesterday I was chaperone for the 8th grade trip to Manhattan. We had the kids almost outnumbered... twelve kids and ten adults. We are friends, after all, us parents, bound together as allies in this war they call "parenting".

It was a long day, I tell you. Especially with one kid, the one who breaks easily and often, who was sneaking Mountain Dew and Skittles behind our backs and bouncing off the walls all day. Catholic school kids, seeing adult video stores (FROM THE BUS ONLY, thank you) and the Naked Cowboy, all in one day.

Speaking of cowboys, I was also keeping an eye out for Marlboro Man and Ree but I didn't see them... if you are a fan of Pioneer Woman, she was/is in Manhattan this week. In a crowd of millions, I somehow couldn't manage to track her down. Phooey. (If you're not a fan, get over there and start reading! I plan to try some of her Photoshop action sets on my photos from the city. )

Ahh... my photos. They suck. They are made of a giant pile of suck. We had a tour guide who had arranged for us to go to the Top of the Rock (which is the tall building in Rockefeller Center). I was eager. I was ready. I had three sets of batteries and I took all of the plane pictures off my memory card after I put them on my computer...and on snapfish... and a few on flickr and... wait, where was I?

Oh.... the Top of the Rock. It shall forever be asterisked in my mind with "That Place We Went That Supposedly Has Fantastic Views But Was Entirely Surrounded by Fcking Clouds." Ahem. And of course, later in the afternoon, when I couldn't go back, it was sunny and clear. (insert cussing...)

I'm not the only one who was slightly disappointed by scheduling... the American Idols are apparently doing a concert on the plaza TODAY. Ooops.

We also went to Madame Tussad's. That was moderately entertaining. Mostly because I could see how tall some of the celebrities are, or aren't. Holy crap, our President is tall. I have a picture of me grabbing Bill Clinton's buns, and one standing next to Brangelina ( Jenn is waaaay over on the other side of the room, blalahahahahaha. ) There was also a George Clooney, in a very nice suit, seated at a cafe table with his hand outstretched. It made a great photo, sitting there holding his hand, what with me in my beautiful, sky blue... windbreaker, and jeans. Hmmph. I went for comfort over fashion. I know. Whatever. There were French girls there who were poking and touching the models (you're not supposed to touch face/hair) and they drove me crazy. Also I swear I spied a real person mixed in with the dolls. My daughter thought so too. His eyes moved. I really think so. Creepy.

I hit the Espn zone quickly to grab something for Mr. Left Behind and Sulking. In the bar there was a soccer game on tv and the crowd went crazy just after I walked in. Aw, shucks, you guys, I didn't even dress up... what? Oh. Who got a goal? I never did figure out. I asked an employee what they were watching and he rolled his eyes and said "soccer" and shrugged. I was hoping for a TEAM NAME, genius.

I need to add a few remarks here about the insanity in Times Square. Part of it is now closed to vehicle traffic, and there are lawn chairs spread all over the street. You read that right. Lawn chairs. Folding metal/ vinyl cheapo lawn chairs. I guess the idea is that it is supposed to give people a place to stop, and sit, and take it all in. Here are my thoughts on that:
  • the cab drivers absofuckinglutely hate it
  • it's kind of random, giving the effect that there is a blackout going on in the city
  • there is not enough hand sanitizer in the city to make me sit on one of those chairs

I didn't see any hookers on this trip. I did see Donald Trump, Jr, I think. He's a tool. I also snuck off from the group and hit Junior's Cheesecake for a slice of cheesecake/carrot cake for the bus ride home. When I rejoined the group they were having none of my nonsense and I had to lead about half of them back to the store so that they could buy some too. Hehee.

I will go through the camera later, and see what I can salvage. For now I'm off to field trip number two, with Mr. Left. Pray for me. Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth graders today. What was I thinking??????

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