When I go out to dinner to a "real" restaurant (or even a wannabe Bistro) with my kids, it's out of sheer desperation. There is nothing in the refridgerator to provide raw materials fora nice home cooked meal, or even a boring meal, and/or there's something we need to do that evening which necessitates dining out because the only other alternative is We Will Not Eat Dinner.
It's not fun, it's WORK. I am pretty much pinging one offspring, then the next, to keep tabs on them and try to head off any socially unacceptable behavior that other diners will go home to kvetch about. Don't bang that, put this down, speak quietly, tell the lady what you want to eat, (following up every remark they make to the server with ".... please"...) etc. Constantly trying to prevent the glasses from being knocked over.
On the outer border of my radar screen I noticed a woman sitting alone at the next table. She was plain, with glasses and no makeup, uneventful hair, unremarkable clothing. She drank a soda of some sort, and played Gameboy while she waited for her food. I could almost feel her being lonely.
Maybe I'm projecting. My husband said to me once that he knows there was a time when we didn't have kids, but he doesn't really remember what it felt like. I can't imagine not having them in my life. I can't imagine being single and sitting at a table in a nice restaurant eating dinner alone. At least, not for any reason other than business travel, and that didn't seem to be the case here. It seemed like more of a "I have nothing else to do so I'll take myself out to dinner" evening.
I am ever mindful of the thought that I am lucky. Lucky to have the spilled soda, and the ketchup on my sleeve, and the mental drain that comes from tracking the movements of two small Tazmanians.
My sister is single, and she doesn't go out to eat alone. Single doesn't have to mean lonely. So it's not really the case that I felt sorry for the woman because she seems to be single. I just felt sadness to see her eating all alone.
I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh,
every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
when it wasn't even whole to start with..... - Kelly Clarkson / David Hodges / Ben Moody
2 comments:
When I'm away from home I feel weird eating out alone as well. I agree that saying "Table for one" shouldn't be synonymous with "I have no friends", but I just feel strange sitting there alone.
Which is why escort services are so nice. You never have to eat alone.
There's a girl with a lot of tatoos who's free now (:::;cartwheel:::::)
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