Saturday, March 31, 2007

March 32nd

We just convinced my son that due to the change of the start of Daylight Savings Time, the government had to add March 32nd to the calendar, just for this year. So April Fool's day will be Monday.

Mwahahaha.

I'm going to switch the cereal bags around and re-glue the boxes. Yes, because I have no life.

The best joke I ever did was to call a friend's husband, read him his address and credit card data, and proceed to tell him someone was racking up charges to 1-900 numbers. He freaked out, screaming "cancel the card!" and so on, hotly denying that the charges were his. His wife listened in and was the "supervisor" that he had to speak to, to get the charges reversed.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Bits and Pieces

Let it Go -
Tim McGraw's new album is (finally!) out. It' s not a huge deal for me but Child1 knew exactly when it would be out and has been asking me for days to download it. It's guaranteed to make TM fans happy, in my opinion. Try to get past Last Dollar (does anyone need to hear his girls sing? It just doesn't work for me.) and if you don't want to buy the whole album sample these:

  • Put your lovin' on me- There’s nothing here to catch me now, I’m gonna fall anyway, It’s just that kinda day,You might not know me good but you know me good enough,To make me okay, okay
    Just close your eyes and put your lovin’ on me, Put your lovin’ on me, Take this weight off me, And put your lovin’ on me.
    He does this style of song well; it reminds me of his "Let me love you".

  • I need you - I wanna get lost in some corner booth, in a cantina in Mexico, I wanna dance to the static of an AM radio, I wanna wrap the moon around us, lay beside you skin on skin, Make love til the sun comes up, til the sun goes down again, 'Cause I need you

    (that one was a duet he did with Faith, on their Soul 2 Soul II tour which totally was HIS concert tour, with her as an opener, but don't tell her that, because I hear she's REALLY a diva and won't come out until most of the seats are filled). Wherever we are, it doesn't matter, as long as you're there with me.

  • Between the River and Me - a good story, in a Garth Brooks "Papa loved Mama" style

  • Kristofferson is also at least a three on the ipod system of stars... ("I found that note you left today, it only took you half a page... I'm gonna grab my old guitar, take a pencil from the jar, and in the empty space, I'm gonna tell you how I feel, straight up genuine and real, open a bottle of 90 proof, and write a song for you, like Kristofferson would do...")

Give it Up -
Child1 regaled me with a story she heard about Paris Hilton, and in a dead-on hilarious PH imitation she said "I'm really NOT dumb, I just pretend to be. I'd like to be a teacher someday." I swear I laughed for 10 minutes straight.

Does it Matter?
My 20th year college reunion. Cocktails and class dinner Saturday night on campus, $50 per ticket. That's the only event I *MIGHT* go to. I'm just not feeling it. For one thing, it's the weekend of the 5K I am working toward, so the Friday night "hello" happy hour is definitely OUT OF THE QUESTION. I don't even know if the people I hung around with will be in town, because honestly I don't really talk to them anymore, and I'm not spending another $100 to sleep over in a dorm. Unimpressed, really.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Fry Pennington

Amelia and I tried to go see the house they're currently building for Extreme Home Makeover. (We both called our husbands after the scrapbooking workshop at the NICU and said "She wants to go see it". OK, we were bored and didn't want to go home...)

Unfortunately we stopped for a McShake and fries first, and the brilliance of the fast food employees ("...do we sell a coffee shake?") inserted a fateful delay in our quickly hatched plan. We got to the "shuttle pickup" location about five minutes toooo late. Oh well.

Since she knows the area we drove around the back...(the street the house is on is blocked off from all traffic) ... from the main road you can see the house since it's lit up like an airport. Much bigger than my house, I have to say.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Santa got run over by a rabbit

So, long story, sorry, but...

My daughter sort of swallowed a piece of candy wrong the other day after school and scared her tutor. She didn't really choke on it but they went to see the nurse just to make sure she was OK. The tutor came out to tell me about it in person and I wasn't upset, it was just one of those things that happen sometimes.

Anyway we were talking about that at dinner and I joked "maybe I'll buy Mrs. E. a big jar of candy from the Easter Bunny." Then I deliberately threw an "oops" face at my son, because he's 9 1/2 now, and I've been wanting to tell him the truth about the Easter Bunny. So it seemed like a good opening, to "accidentally" tell him. (He still watches for Santa every year and gets upset if he doesn't get to the mall for a visit. It's time.)

I waited for the light bulb to go on, and it didn't. Mr. C gave it a try. "Dude, how big do you think the Easter Bunny is?" D started gesturing this big, etc.

I said, "Well, the easter bunny is about my size..."and looked at him pointedly.

Lonnnnnnnng silence.

"Because... it's me."

He blinked, finally, and then shot into denial. "No, Mom, stop. That's not funny." Indignant. Offended. I was talking about The Rabbit. So I said, well, I can prove it... and I took his hand, and showed him his Easter candy for this year.

Then, of course, the tears started. Because, he figured out that, "So this means Santa... and the Tooth Fairy..."

He was crushed, and on the edge of bitter. So we had to explain that we didn't want some older kid at school to tell him, and get him MORE upset, and laugh at him and call him a baby, because he is big now, and he gets to be part of the magic and the fun, for the younger cousins in our family. It was hard when I told him, you're not my baby any more, you're a big kid, and parents let go of their kids and let them get older even though they may not want to. "Why?" Ugh.

Things turned when he realized that B had never figured out that I buy their Easter candy from the school fundraiser every year. For some reason her confusion got him to laugh. Mostly because she played it up in a blonde sort of way. "

He laughed even harder when I described a Christmas eve when I asked someone (I think it was my brother) to go out and make footprints on the fresh snow on the deck, from the stairs to the patio door and back. For some reason my brother said "Do I have to walk backwards the whole time so the footprints go in the right direction?" (um, walk to the stairs, and back.... ) and it cracked us up when I reenacted it.

So he's a little annoyed (that I throw his teeth away), but the worst seems to be over because he figured out he'll still get gifts. I said that this year we can do Secret Santa and each one of us can have a person we'll surprise. Plus, there will be 3 younger cousins, if all goes well.

But it was a horrible day; Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy are all gone now. No more babies here.


What's in that bag?

Suzy got a quick visit today from our parents. She called me immediately afterward, laughing. My mother has this habit of clutching her purse very closely to her, no matter where she is. Suzy had to practically p-r-y it from her fingertips to get her to put it down on the coffee table. She really doesn't like to leave it in another room.

Suzy swears she has a gold bar in there. Any other ideas? Mind you, we've never actually looked in it.

(On another note, my mother in law once was helping my brother in law move. She put her purse in a cupboard because she was afraid the people who were coming to move the actual furniture might steal it. But then she forgot where she put it. So, we have issues in this family with purses.)

As for me, I hate to carry a purse. There's something in me that rebels. I will stick my phone in one pocket, the tiniest wallet possible in another. (Okay, it's a change purse, but it holds $20 and my debit card. Whatever.) Then of course I am somewhere and I need something that is in my purse. Happens all the time. I have big ones, little ones. They're all very nice, but I just don't like to carry a purse around. I think I'm missing a chromosome or something.

How to Impress Your New Boss, in 3 E-Z Steps

Take notes, there will be a quiz:

  1. When he stops by, be eating pretzels. At 9:33 a.m. Make sure you have one in your hand and you are chewing another. Because not only can you NOT say "Hi" immediately, you will have to reluctantly, uh, discreetly, drop the pretzel back into the bag.
  2. You should be listening to your iPod (bonus points for Sirius radio with antenna visible). Thank god for "rear view mirrors" on monitors. Objects are closer than they appear.
  3. Wearing a sloppy gray fleece sweatshirt and jeans makes the statement "I got to work today, what more do you want?" (Actually this attire earns bonus points too, if he is wearing "business casual" button down shirt/ no tie, and Dockers. Because it means he didn't pay a dollar a day to the designate charity to dress down this week, ergo he thinks it's stupid to do so, and/or that no one should wear jeans to work. Oh, joy.)

At least I wasn't reading a blog... at that moment...

The important thing is to act nonchalant, like "yeah, whatever, I listen to music, you know how much work I get done...don't vex me. Did you need something? Ok, bye bye then."

Keep in mind that this is the company wherein I can receive an email like this one, which I swear I got first thing this morning, with a cc: to my boss:

We, the members of the Something Something Project Team, would like to recognize

Carly Andmylastnametoo, all bold and centered exactly like this

for his/her* contributions as a Line of Business Coordinator.The SSPT blah blah blah blah...(this paragraph describes what they struggled to do...and oh man did they do a CRAPPY job, in my opinion)

We are very grateful for the time and energy that Carly has given to this initiative, and we want to thank him/her for the hard work.

I've never really been thanked like this for a project. The irony is that about 2/3 of the way through the project I sent the project manager a 2 page email listing about 10 things I felt she was doing wrong(sent it on the last Friday before Xmas, ho ho effing ho). Bitchy? Well, yes, but the next stop on her rollout schedule was the corporate headquarters. I genuinely felt they would roast her over a large bonfire if she kept doing things exactly the way she was doing them. I honestly was trying to save her sorry ass. Her documentation was wrong in multiple places, we were getting errors we should NOT have been getting, and the vendor was completly useless. She proceeded to ignore or argue with all of my feedback. Ok, it's your funeral.

*Note, the funniest part of the email; I am now of uncertain gender, despite the fact (?) that my first name is most definitely a female name. This will ABSOLUTELY impress my boss.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Not a real green dress, that's cruel

Perhaps you've heard the Barenaked Ladies version of "If I had a million dollars" (used by an old NYS lottery commercial...)

Yesterday it came on Sirius while I was driving with my daughter. One nice feature of my radio is that I can "rewind" and play a song over, say 3 or four times, singing it progressively louder to my pre-teen who tried to pretend that she was soooo annoyed and I'm sooo not cool, but was secretly loving every second of Mom acting like somewhat of a jackass.

I had to explain one or two lines two her, like the title of this post. (Verse 1, I'd buy you a fur coat, but not a real fur coat, that's cruel...verse 2, I'd buy you a green dress.... )

But yes, I suceeded in implanting it firmly in her brain, and today, she wanted it on her iPod. Mwahahaha. If only I could use my powers for good.

I love you, internets

...because I can go shopping online for something like

this which will motivate me since I added "if you don't jump you never know if you can fly" below all of my phone numbers... plus it will make my family happy when I go out running on my own. The quote is from a song by Miranda Lambert... "New Strings". And it's red, by the way. Power color.


I can also stock up on stuff like Badger balm (Tangerine...) which is great; I can't wear gloppy lipstick that is too much like vaseline. . . I am apparently allergic to something petroleumish and why do people put that on their face anyway? I found this lip balm in Bath & Body works but now those greedy bastards don't sell it anymore. Hmmph. So I buy online.

After I get all my shopping done I have time for things like this and these.

Time's up... gotta go sing something somewhere.

Friday, March 23, 2007

On (my) mark

I signed up for my race today. (June 2...)

I almost bagged the whole thing the other day - my friend called and I casually said "Sooo, how fast do you run on the treadmill?" And it's at least 2.5 mph MORE than my speed. Psych! So I fretted to someone who convinced me to run anyway, at my speed(thanks!!)

This afternoon since it was actually SPRING outside so I took the kids out to a park and I ran* for a couple of minutes, then walked, repeat. Holy crap - it's WAY harder to run when you are actually propelling yourself and not just waltzing over a moving treadmill...good times.


*ok, sort of staggered... :-)

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Qualifiers

So, for the 40th birthday party of someone I know, everyone is required to bring an eligible bachelor for her perusal. She's kidding.

I think.

She said she'll be wearing a t-shirt that reads "Some Restrictions May Apply."

If I ever find myself single I will develop a list of screening questions - because of the HUNDREDS of potential suitors, of course. (Just go along with me for this post.)

Questions like these. Some restrictions may apply...

1. Have you ever ridden in a canoe or kayak? (Do you own a jet ski? Go home. ) Do you have access to a camp where I can canoe/ kayak / make campfires at least once a summer? If not will you drive me somewhere and rent me a canoe once annually to keep me happy? What will you ask of me in return?

2. Do you tailgate? If yes, go home.

3. What is the recipe for your best dish? What wine would you serve with it? If you don't cook at least a FEW things, go home.

4. Can you iron a shirt? Without sighing? Do you understand the intricacies of the steam settings on a standard household iron? If you answered no to any of the questions in #3... go home.

5. What is your favorite Sirius channel? Martha Stewart fans need not apply. Howard Stern fans will not automatically be eliminated, but I need m-u-s-i-c on the way to work. Not talking. So, we can never carpool.

6. Name your 3 favorite tv shows. (Sport programs may be include as an answer here and will not be held against you unless you plan to answer with the word "Golf". Golf is ok to DO, not to watch, and only if you don't make me go do it with you. Acceptable viewing of sports -if viewed in moderation- include baseball, football, basketball, and yes, that thing on ice. In return for your agreement to never put the channel on Nascar I will vow to never utter the words "time for my soap opera." However, I will be watching Dancing With the Stars each week. )

These are the initial questions off the top of my head. Please share additional suggestions or offer me your own screening questions.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Some Restrictions May Apply

On my way to work today I was tailgated by a dude in a bright cherry red Hummer. Eff you, baby. I was doing 67 so I felt NO obligation whatsoever to move out of his way. SO in adjusting my radio I ended up slowing down to about 63... still more than he deserved. Paper covers rock, Jeep blocks Hummer.

He kept thinking about going around me, edging right then snapping back left, and it was clear he wanted me to Just Move. And that's exactly why I didn't want to. The beautiful thing was when I merged right because my exit was coming up, I accidentally truly blocked him in for about a mile. He was livid, but there were crawlers in front of both of us and on my right so I really had no where to go. Pooor baby.

Why do men spaz out when someone is "in their way" ? Hey, I'm on my way to work too, putz, and this is the lane I need to be in right now; I'm sorry you think it's yours. If you get past me, then you have to get past the person in front of me, then the next person... why do all that work? Go with the flow and listen to your radio. This isn't a damn Indy car race.

Why does tailgating make some people move, and make other people dig in their heels and not give up 'their' spot in a line of traffic?

I blew him a kiss, but I don't think he appreciated it. Fool.

Monday, March 19, 2007

There's a sucker born every minute

This just tickles me in a way that carbonation can't...

http://www.wric.com/Global/story.asp?S=6247401

It turns out the famed "natural mineral water" baths at New York's Saratoga Spa State Park are diluted with regular tap water.

A state parks official confirmed that today, after the New York Post first reported it.

The Post says that heated public drinking water is mixed with the chilly carbonated mineral waters that made Saratoga famous. The paper says that's been going on for about two decades, since the park's 1930s-era mineral water heater broke down.

Saratoga is known as a summer playground for rich people in awe of their own fabulous-ness. Guess the joke's on them, huh? You want hot bubbly water... here you go... Barnum would be so proud.

Dancing with the (B list) stars

OK... I am a fan of the show. But holy jazz hands, it was all over the map tonight.

I love Cliffie Claven. There, I said it. I'd dance with him at a wedding and have a blast. Considering he had less time to rehearse than some, and he's easy to bet on as a sentimental favorite, he should do fine for a while.

The former Miss USA? Plastic and OH so annoying. I can't even bring myself to look up her name. Shaina, no... Shandi. Kinda rhymes with Kandi, with a heart over the "i".

Bored me - Heather Mills, Paulina, and The Tall Legendary Basketball Star I Never Heard of Because I'm A Chick. Oh, and some of the guys...

Person who dances most like me: sadly, Billy Ray Cyrus. I bet Karina REALLY misses Mario now, huh? cough cough tramp cough cough But put him out of his misery; either Billy or Leeza will go home first. Hopefully!

Two couples to watch - Laila Ali, and Apolo. I hope they make at least the final four. Joey Fat One can go home.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

More art blogs

This one - little people - is very amusing. I love the various shots of each scene, to get the full range of scale and detail.

This one is very strange, yet I like it - rabbit.

both courtesy of a link on PostSecret

Friday, March 16, 2007

Snowed in = dines now

Since it's snowing like crazy I made dinner (we were supposed to all be out somewhere tonight so I made up a plan b...)

I took some lettuce, half of a loaf of crusty italian bread chopped into cubes, small tomatoes, some chopped basil, tiny pearls of fresh mozzarella, and a little bit of white onion. I mixed it all together, then drizzled 1/3 cup of "evoo" (olive oil) mixed with 1 Tbsp of balsamic vinegar over it. Yummy.

I cooked up the rest of the onions, made some beeeeef, and we at it all with the other half of the loaf of bread. There may have been red wine. I'm not telling.

Wish you were there, Internets. If only because my kids at a few bites of their salad and then made those wrinkly faces....

Additional

...proof that my universe is actually a video game being played by a delinquent teenager with a deliciously warped sense of humor...

Today I came out of the supermarket to find I had not one but TWO FLAT TIRES on the front of my new vehicle.

How flat, you ask? The white letters on my new tires were touching the ground.

As my luck would have it I am now temporarily driving a Jeep Renegade with lights strung across the top and little studs decorating it here and there. (Note: I know I am too old and not cool/hot enough for this vehicle. I am lukewarm. I am certain of this, because I have no idea how to turn the top lights on. Although to be fair, I drove it home from the market and that's it. I was a little distracted.)

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Win win win

Thank you, universe, for not sneezing on me today. For approximately 15 minutes today (at 1:45 to be exact)* my workday didn't suck. We ended on a high note! Yaaaay!

Also I recruited someone else to run the race with me. So now I have about five women... and John... ;-)

I'm off to the learning fair to see what projects the other mommies and daddies did... toodles... Suzy coached my child on the construction of this lovely project. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you.....




*Time spent talking to friends, family, etc is not factored into this sentence; neither is browsing the internet for bizarre news stories or LOST recaps. (Two words: didn't suck.)

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Cowboy, take me away

I'm in a sucky mood. So I'll type this, but you all don't have to read it. Really, go here instead:
http://wymanmeinzer.com/ for pretty pictures of places I wish I was. (Like here.)

1. My job fills me with the type of sinking dismay that brings words like "Lowest Ranking Chambermaid on the Titanic" to mind. My boss pulled me aside for a "no, really, what's wrong?" chat that I really did not want to have today. Mostly because asking me that makes me cry and I hate. crying. in. front. of. my. boss. I am not 12. I am almost 42.* WTF???? What's wrong is we have too much work to do and it's not well prioritized, and I have a nutjob on my team. No, not ME...

2. It's
that time of year again. Shamrocks make me sad, just for a day or so, every year.

3. I have neither buttermilk NOR those seeds one adds to Irish Soda Bread when one makes it once a year. And my effing corned beef keeps boiling over, on my flattop stove that I am kind of fond of. Which is now all nasty brown, and I'll be scraping it later with a razor blade.

4. I am gaining, not losing weight. Yay, treadmill. And don't try to stoke me with "it's muscle weight". It's pizza, wine, and crackers and dip weight. It's a little scary to me that one of my first questions to John was "what can I eat the morning of the race?" (well, after "do real runners wear socks, wtf, mine keep bunching up under my toes and driving me crazy")

5. Typing lists does nothing to solve my problems. So then I get mad at myself for having a bad day. It's all really productive. I did take an online "what kind of job is right for you" test that shows I am in completely the wrong field. I apparently would be better in a career that involves art or food service. So I am going to start a buisiness publishing redesigned restaurant menus. I should be able to make about $50 bucks a month doing that.


*(Yes Amelia, not for six months, I know; and I hope you feel better soon.)

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Time Out

Shopping for an extra-tall 12 year old with big feet is VERY frustrating when all you can find is this:


This is so not happening for several reasons, one of which is "nothing around the ankle and you will tip over and fall out of these", one is "you can't be taller than me" and another is "your father will get mad at me if I buy you something so slutty".

So we got to have our first set of "why won't you buy me what I want to wear?" fights, complete with pouting, exasperated sighs, and stamping around the store. And that was just my behavior.

Couple that with wondering "what the hell time is it REALLY?" every time I glance at a clock, and it's already been a long day.

A day which started with a call from work about a DST related problem. Thank god for the internets, I can work from home. It turns out that the problem had nothing to do with the DST change, but try telling my client that. Hmmph.

Flave, do YOU know what time it is? I don't know what time it is... can someone tell me what time it is?

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Stellar

My achievements at work this week include:

  • Moving code changes to production for two databases, making my clients delighted
  • Securing estimates and funding for various upcoming projects, keeping my team busy
  • Dumping a 20 oz styrofoam cup full of hot tea directly onto my phone, avoiding my laptop, which we all know is far more expensive. Watching tea gush down the cubicle wall to the power strip below(flinging napkins at same to dry it without getting fried), and NOT electrocuting myself while unplugging my dripping, leaking phone... but hey, the next day it worked again!!!)
  • Making a "he's got a screw loose" statement with accompanying gesture just as our new manager came around the corner (I meant someone else... I swear!!!)

and the crowning achievement:

  • Cut and paste the LOST recap from MSNBC into a new email, typing a few sarcastic comments to add my own insight throughout the recap... and sending it to my boss. ... instead of the intended recipient, a friend...and not even realizing my error.

Luckily my current-soon-to-be-former manager has a huge sense of humor and DIDN'T do anything other than walk into my cube and say "Uh, did you mean to send ME that recap?"

:::::thud:::::

She just came by in person to enjoy the rosy glow on my face. Looks like all of that butt kissing I do has COMPLETELY paid off. Always brownnose, kids.

For the record, I am going to work from home tomorrow and not send any emails or instant messages. I will consume no beverages unless I am standing in my kitchen next to the sink. Or I'll stand IN the sink.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Mom Quiz

(Well, I ain't no Pop, so this is a Mom Quiz.... )

This afternoon I told Thing One to get in the shower so that I could do some laundry asap afterwards, since I have a "meeting" tonight. *

Thing One was still ambling around a few minutes later so I repeated my request.

"I don't have any underwear."

The correct parental response in this case is


a) "How can I do the laundry if you don't finish your shower like I asked?"
b) "Why didn't you tell me when you took the LAST CLEAN PAIR OUT?"
c) Watch this and pretend not to hear the child speaking (thanks for lending them to me, Amelia!!)
d) B, then A, then make a batch of these and marvel at the goodness that is The Doughboy... that peculiar stumpy little guy sure makes good stuff.

No matter what you select as your answer, you must immediately tell yourself you have failed as a mother. It's part of the test.

*the meeting is the officer's planning meeting for an organization that I belong to. We shall have beer and something served with french fries and discuss other members of the organization. No, we're going to discuss important business. Heh.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Hi

It's not you... it's me. Of course I still love you, my blog readers (all 5 of you)....

While I wasn't looking someone turbocharged my clocks and now they are running too fast. It is just NOT possible for me to get everything done. I give up! And don't even get me started on "Daylight Savings Time" moving this year. We had 18 months to prepare for Y2K and now we're trying to pull this out of our ass in only a few weeks. By "we" I mean the entire banking industry in this country. Go to an ATM Saturday, kiddies. No, really.

Thankfully, basketball season is o-v-e-r. (Who's the best mommy? Not me. I was sitting right there and did not see him make a basket yesterday. WTF? I believe it was because I was lamenting the fact that it was a scrimmage only - the other team hadn't shown up- and I just wanted to go home and rest my weary head. On a related note, at a fundraiser the other night I may have had some wine. Perhaps. )

Also in the silent auction at the fundraiser I "won" cough cough paid for cough cough a gift certificate to Lake George Kayak Co. So this summer my adventure will be to try kayaking with my brother in law - yes, the same one I dragged parasailing. It's only a one day rental, I'm not made of money ya know. (Until after tomorrow's megamillions drawing, that is. Then I am going to hightail it to one of 3 places: Tahiti, with Suzy; the Oregon coast, if I can drag my entire extended family, or #3 which I'm not giving away here... because I have no idea where that would be. )

The silent auction had five minutes left, and some wealthy old bitch came along, looked at my bid (the ONLY bid on the page) and upped it. Are you kidding me? My friend Dave just laughed at the look on my face. Yes, I upped it again to win. But I apparently seemed as if I was ready to smack the diamonds right off her.

That's about all I have. Well, except for one thing - I wore a new sweater to work today, and someone indirectly told me that it made my chest look huge. So, I need to go back and buy one in every color, or slap that person in the face. Decisions, decisions.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

March-ing

Hey. It's spring. Why is there still SNOW????

First, a few words about my previous post. If you read my blog regularly, you know I volunteer at the NICU where Suzy works. I'm a very small part of a March of Dimes program, and my role is helping the parents make scrapbooks of their babies' first days.

I'm very proud of my sister and what she does. She is very skilled, (got great grades in college) and she also puts her heart into her work. If you could only see the beautiful memorial books she creates for the hospital to give to families who lose their child.... well, you'd know what I mean. Each one is filled with delicate images of fairies and dragonflies and flowers and nature, and the familes absolutely cherish them. There are places for tiny footprints, locks of hair, notes from people who helped care for the child, and so on. Every one is unique.

You can open your heart, and bond with some of your patients and their families, and help them, without losing yourself and having it turn into "too involved", such that it burns you out. Sometimes, forming those bonds that can be a very beautiful thing. Humbling, a bit. I'm humbly gratified that the family whose loss inspired my previous post found what I wrote to be of some comfort to them.

My life is still very much a work in progress. My whole purpose in starting this blog was "oh my gosh, I'm going to be 40... I need to figure out how to be comfortable with who I am (things I wish I'd done differently in my past) and figure out what I want for my future."

Right now the future, specifically, that I'm concerned with is that of my job, because while it has some great benefits, also has some giant headaches and uncertainty. I really have no idea what to do about that, or what career I'd switch to if I were to switch(it could be my choice, or not). And of course, money is always an issue or I wouldn't be working in the first place. So I will continue to march in place, and try to do the best I can to take advantage of opportunities I see.

I wish I had more time to do things like the MoD program. Most days, I am overwhelmed. I very often feel like I don't know what to do first; I see things sitting waiting to be finished, every place that I look. Sometimes the Mom guilt wins out, and I push aside things I want to do for myself. Not good!

I am still working toward my goal of running the 5K. It's slow going at this point (93 days away!!!) I realize now I may not "run" the entire thing, but I will run some, walk the rest... and next year I'll run more of the course.

Well, as I said, it's spring and my house is a mess. Time to clean. (big sigh)