One of the highlights of my day was my daughter's face when I gave her this lobster pillow.
This giant amusement (it's seriously 2' long, mimics a 6 1/2 lb lobster...) comes courtesy of Amelia, who got it as a gag gift last Xmas. Thanks, she loved it and it will be a funny addition to the beach room.
It is definitely not fun to hear your kid say "mom, I failed another science test... but I studied so hard." To see the dejection and self doubt creep back in... sucks. Mightily. She is smart enough to know when she's not performing on the same level as her classmates-- no matter how I try to pretty it up by calling a consultant teacher a tutor. I tell her that I know she's trying to do her best and that I know there are some things that just come harder for her, but I still see her hurting.
I try to remind her that school grades are so focused on specific skills, that sometimes they're just not a true picture of someone's strengths. I mean, it's like going to a dance contest, and you're a fantastic ballerina, and they want you to tap dance. She's a great singer - at the age of 10 she was singing a solo at the school play (Impossible, from Cinderella). But "choir" doesn't get a grade on her report card. Science does.
At any rate, I am always happy when I can throw her a little surprise like this and watch her face light up. Next week, another meeting with the committee for special ed. Happy happy joy joy. I'm bringing reinforcements.
Work continues to be bizzarre. You know what? I work because I need the extra money. Not because I've always dreamed of being a fantastic programmer, the best geek ever. I don't even LIKE Star Trek. I'd be content to be content, i.e. being a reasonably average programmer. I don't like to "play the game" and do the politics and maneuver and try to outguess people. Just give me work to do, and I'll do it, but I want to leave at 2pm so that I can take care of my kids because you only pay me until then and I'm really not interested in working unpaid overtime. Thank you.
The other highlight of my day was when I said "wax on, wax off" to someone in an instant message and he said "Actually I prefer wax on, wax on, wax on, waxonwaxonwaxon wax off."
So it was that kind of day.
5 comments:
Cool pillow. I bought my dad the trout one a few years ago. He likes wierd stuff like that. Travel down their road to Lake Sacandoga and you'll see their big ugly Bass mailbox.
I know what its like for her. I did poorly in History. Especially US History. It wasn't for lack of trying, or bribery, I just didn't enjoy it enough to retain the information. My wife often volunteers at schools to help students such as your daughter and she says the same thing. Many children are very bright and most even study very hard, but its as if their brain refuses to store the info long term. She probably used a bunch of psycho mumbo jumbo and teacher terms.. but that was the gist.
I'm glad your daughter has such a great mom to help her out. Stick with her. Review the tests and pray like I did that you can counter the tests with homework grades (something you {and others} can review the answers to before submitting)
Carly we are exploring a new thing at school this year... it's called "Follow the Child" and the main focus is to give those kids that just aren't cutting it in an "instert square peg into square hole" kind of a world a better school experience. Math credits for kids who work in a car shop so many hours a week with a list of things they have to accomplish and learn and a meeting every week with their math teacher etc. etc...
More for the kids who conventional learning isn't working for. The over smart kids as well as the lower ones and all the ones in between. I think it's just a NH program at the moment... but it might just catch on elsewhere. They gave us a number of hours we had to be inschool instead of a number of days... no one said it had to be doing standard school work.
Anyhow... I forget why I started typing this. You Give B a giant hug from me and tell her she's doing a great job. School is hard work, and it's hard to watch your kids struggle. It's hard for those of us who work with those kids too.. because we see those same looks on thier faces at school. Hang in there!
You're a good mom :) I know it's hard for your daughter to see this now, but you know she will be successful in life when she's able to truly explore her strengths outside of academia.
Sometimes people just want programmers who ... program. Crazy thought. I do IT recruiting and one of my favorite memories is of a client saying, "get me a programmer who I can stick in a room with my specs and slide a pizza under the door every once in a while."
Please don't take this the wrong way, but have you considered maybe your daughter has Test Anxiety? I know it sounds strange, who doesn't get anxious taking a test - but it is a true issue. I found out I had it when I was 20 years old. My mom didn't buy it at the time, but then a couple of years ago I found an old HS report card and was shocked to see I would have excellent six-weeks averages, then you'd see my mid-term exam grades and they'd be crazy low. Polar opposite grades, in fact. Anyway, it really made a difference. Of course, I could also be just way out in the dark here and you and your daughter already know about this. Anyway, good luck to her. She'll make it!
ThatGirl,
yes, she does have test anxiety.
It stems from the specific nature of her learning disabilities which is that she can verbally tell you a complex sentence, but can't put that sentence on paper easily at all. Written ANYTHING is hard for her. She writes very slowly and it's full of spelling errors (often transpositions) and very simple grammar.
So, rushing and not being able to get her thoughts down make her stressed out.
She's been tested for dyslexia and things like that. It's not that, it's more like a disconnect in making her hands write what her brain knows. Plus she gets thrown off by wording of multiple choice questions. Like, she misses the word "not" and so answers a question backwards. So we're working on test taking skills, among other things.
PS: thanks, I know you are being helpful and not negative
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