Blue Morning

I'm in a little bit of a funk today. I guess maybe it's a combination of "holiday weekend but no big plans" and "it's the end of summer". It has not exactly been an uplifting week as far as the hurricane news, so that definitely factors in.

Went to church and Stanley noticed. "You look sad, what's the matter?" I love him. Stanley, you will recall, is the organist and choir director who has been at our church for 50 years. He's adorable.

It didn't seem the time or place to explain that I'm moping and not exactly sure why, so I mentioned that my son was going to be an altar server for the first time today. So I think he chalked it up to "sentimental Mom".

(Go ahead, make the priest jokes. But go somewhere else to do it. We like our church and our parochial school and my kids are very happy there. Do I sound defensive? Whatever. My son could't wait to serve. He was up at 6:30 this morning and got dressed before Mr and I were even out of bed.)

Perhaps part of my sulk is that my kids seem to be growing up so quickly and the first day of school is looming over me and driving that point home.

Sometimes I wonder - why are some people so content to just spend all day at home puttering around, and somehow it makes me restless and unhappy? I'm not even sure what I want to do, or where I want to go. I feel like there are so many projects I should do, but I just don't WANT to, not even the fun stuff like scrapbooking because it just seems like such a major project to pull stuff out.

How can someone I see for an hour a week notice, and yet I feel like other people closer to me don't notice? That's frustrating sometimes. Or are they sick of me being grumpy? I sure am.

Oh, bother.