Letters

In chronological order....

Dear Lean Cuisine,
Please stop putting red bell peppers in every effing frozen meal you make. It's killing me and Suzy. Because your food is good otherwise but WTF with the red peppers in everything?

best regards,
Carly


Dear cafeteria manager where I work,
please make better food so I don't have to bring crappy frozen meals anymore. It's too effing cold out to leave the building at lunchtime.

~Carly


Dear EveryOther Employee of My Company,
why do you make the Tuesday after a Monday-holiday SO hard? Mondays are bad enough but when it's really Tuesday and feels like a double Monday, something is terribly wrong. Quit calling me and forwarding me crap! It was 2:00 before I could start what I planned to do today. So, I got really far with that. Yeah.

smooches,
~C


Dear Supermarket Manager,
why are the Valentines out already? Dammit man. Didn't I have a long enough day?
~C

Dear Child 1,
why didn't you remind me YESTERDAY that you needed a piece of posterboard. Or, I don't know, maybe SATURDAY? When I had time to help you with the project?

xo
~Mom


Dear Child 2,
Why do I pay $80 a month for you to play an instrument when I never actually hear you play it? It's this little thing called PRACTICE.... how can you practice if you don't bring it home??
Love,
~Mommy


Dear internets,
thanks for putting up with my bitching
~Carly